Alexander Pope : "In faith and hope the world will disagree, but all mankind's concern is charity."

No, the world's concern is one's own happiness. Charity is just an excuse just like ever changing morals ; just to make oneself feel good about what they do.

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action.

- Benjamin Disraeli

none

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.

- Abraham Lincoln

What is power? Why do we want it so much?

“Music is the balm that heals the forlorn ache of a distant star.” - Don Williams Jr.
It isn't a permanent heal, but it dulls it. But it can also make it worse. Hence why have to be careful what is listened to. Some of the best sounding stuff is poison, a sweet poison; poison still. You are poison?

Eh, no title. Always something eating away at something. A cycle of fighting. What is right and what is not? What are the rules and who is keeping and breaking them. Are you weak by going along by the rules and laws, or is it outdated like an 8-track player? Are you a rebel or a visionary for going against something; or is it a run for power. All these movies now adays, they make the good and bad both "fun" looking. Yeah there is a good side vs bad but now the lines intersect. Make one feel for both sides. Blurs the lines. Even tv shows, make all sex and any jokes fun or um, "tolerable". How is it right? Is it too "out of date" to disagree and walk away from or is it ok? Being gay or bisexual or well a bed hopper (put it in terms not crude) or such, purposefully vs unavoidable exposure. Who stands for walking out? Why are we afraid of stepping up against that? ..... Fin ..... What is right anyways anymore? it is all being taught as grey and elastic today, in life, school, religious areas, Christianity. There is no solid ground. Like a road made not of solid foundation but more astro turf, lots of little bits of rubber so "no one gets hurt" Hm, what now?

never enough

Exerpt from "Lies" by evanescence

"Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear

Sealed with lies through so many tears

Lost from within and pursuing the end

I fight for the chance to be lied to again



You will never be strong enough

You will never be good enough

You were never conceived in love

You will not rise above"

I don't belong. Everywhere I go to I'm outcast. I go to work and I do my job, but just don't fit in. I go to my little hole in the wall and its empty and cold. I don't go drink and get made fun for that, but they sure like it when I'm designated driver back for them. Someone needs a hand at something, they ask and I help em but if I hesitate or can't then I'm some loser. Not really into video games anymore so there I'm a loser. Don't go out trying to pick up women like they cause I only want one woman and she is gone. Apparently,there is no place for me. Lies, evanescence got that right. What did Irwin Federman say : "“People love others not for who they are but for how they make them feel”. That's love huh? To the abyss with it then if that is true. Cause then choice is nothing more than feeling and anything would go due to feelings. Then anything can change in a heartbeat, and it me relative.

welcome to the world of "feel good religion" maybe its all a lie. Just another thing to make people feel good about whatever they do. Hence all the different "interpretations" of scripture- pentacostal, baptist, non-denominational and denominational "christian", catholicism, etc. Guess all those years of studying Bible really opened the eyes of these "scholars" in these sections, some 50 and sixty years; but little ole me must be stupid cause I thought the bible said "Ephesians 4:4
4 There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope of your calling;5 One Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 One God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all." Guess the bible was wrong. Pick the flavor of the month.
No matter what I'm never good enough, never truly forgiven, not smart enough, not strong enough, not enough; just deserted, left to rot, but hey, I'm just a meaningless grain of sand, on a beach miles and miles long.

E P e o p l e l o v e o t h e r s n o t f o r w h o t h e y a r e b u t f o r h o w t h e y m a k e t h e m

E o n "

E f e e l - I r w i n F e d e r m a n - w e l c o m e t o t h e w o r l d o f " f e e l g o o d r e l i g i

George Santayana : "The idea of Christ is much older than Christianity."

what is lost is not coming back. for it was lost and never looked for.

Henry Ward Beecher : "I can forgive, but I cannot forget is only another way of saying, "I will not forgive." Forgiveness ought to be like a canceled note-torn in two and burned up so that it never can be shown against one."

Guess I was never forgiven. So I walk back to an empty place, cold and disorganized. Alone, empty, not belonging and not cared of.

Hollow and dead, I see no light. Just a constant impression of not fitting in and helpless and lost.

The future is not something we enter. The future is something we create.

- Leonard I. Sweet

~ - R i c h a r d L e G a l l i e n n e

~ S t a y t h e c o u r s e , l i g h t a s t a r , C h a n g e t h e w o r l d w h e r e ' e r y o u a r e .

1 John 5:12

Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life.

Fury

Why is there such fury in my heart? How can I not know what o do or allow it to come to mind? Such fury in all this, I wish I knew if I should be asking You to help me forget or if You are making me remember for some reason. What is it God?! I don’t know what o do! I know what I want, and it’s her, yet why am I so slow? Is there any hope? Why do I want to blame You most of all? I know I made mistakes an I have been working at them!

Sometimes I think like a kid, “ok so  I messed up. Well I work to not mess up and do better....  that should equal it being ok again.” No, not so, but how I ask and beg for some miracle for some softening, for real forgiveness in our hearts. There has to be  a greater thing than this! There is too much sin and seared hearts, it just keeps getting worse, Save us from it!

I beg and plead and cry for salvation for us! You are the only one able; yes we can do some decent things, but without You filling up every aspect, then it is what is said about love…. 1 Corinthians 13

 1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails.

Teach me what this means. Please, Holy One, show the way and carry me, her, us all, through. Please do not lt go as we have done to You....forgive me for that please....Your will be done.

but the one whom the Lord commends.

~ o r d . F o r i t i s n o t t h e o n e w h o c o m m e n d s h i m s e l f w h o i s a p p r o v e d ,

Edmund Burke : "Education is the cheap defense of nations."

2 Corinthians 7:1

Therefore, since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting

holiness out of reverence for God.

~ 2 C o r i n t h i a n s 1 0 : 1 7 - 1 8

B u t , L e t t h e o n e w h o b o a s t s b o a s t i n t h e L

Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.

- Anonymous

To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.

- Winston Churchill

I want to DIE! How I have asked You continually to remove my life from this earth. How I have tried on my own to do it! I’m not scared of it and welcome it. NO! it is wrong, because well, that is not the death You want. Death Yes! I will call anyone who says You don’t want us to die a liar!

But Like Saul who instead of obliterating the Amalekites as You commanded in 1 Samuel, he killed lots but kept the best livestock and stuff  for “sacrificing” , or when the ark of the covenant was brought back after David was made king in 2 Samuel 6, how instead of bring the ark back with priests and such, it was brought in a cart and Uzzah, when the oxen stumbled, reached out to not have the ark fall, he died cause he touched it, as it was not supposed to be touched. We bring this on ourselves! We do things our way and while it looks good, or seems good (Uzzah was trying to do something good, but it was disobedience), it is a deviation of Your way and plan!

How does it turn into death? How can I have such confidence You want us to die? You say so ! Yet not in the way that I have asked.

1 Peter 2:24
“He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.”

Colossians 3:5&6 “⁵ Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. ⁶ Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.”

Romans 8:13
For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.

“Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.” James 1:21 NIV

This is the death which You ask of us, and will carry us to if we let You. Oh how I want to do that, but God, I'm so distraught in this and sad. Why is my heart so tormented and such? I beg for anothr chance! I'M GONNA MESS UP, but please, give me chances. I may be slow, but I can do better eve if it's a bloody centimeter at a time. Again I ask for a miracle for reconciliation and a softened heart. I come to You crawling with my face in the dirt! I'm sorry for my shortcomings, please do not remove Yourself, for then living truly would not be worth it. Please hear my pleas. May they not have fallen empty, though it feels so hollow because I'm an imperfect creature. 

Hm, disguise of the heart

Psalm 22:1
[ Psalm 22 ] For the director of music. To the tune of “The Doe of the Morning.” A psalm of David. My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish?

Matthew 27:46
About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).

Mark 15:34
And at three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).

The man after Your own heart said this and Your Son, said this. How I long to also say it! How I have longed for it, to be able to do it.

NO! I cannot! Instead, these are the words I have right to say, for the truth in them is undeniable. “ My God, My God why have I forsaken YOU?!”

From the time of my conception You have been there, before any knew my existence You were there, winding the sinews and threads of my soul and life. Why then do I blame You? Why then do I forsake the one who wants nothing but what is best for me? My God and creator, what am I but dust…… What am I but a tomb of death. My sins I carry, not because I must, but because I refuse to let You be You in my life.

You spoke through Jesus this….Matthew 23:27, 28
“Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. ²⁸ In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.”

When did it become so that I have become this? You know the thoughts of our hearts, the death we become when we believe that we are righteous of our own, that we are the victims. NO, we are not! I deserve this pain, for it is a consequence of sin and imperfection. You did nothing and yet were cast out and tormented by all ..... to the point of death! Where will it end?  

I need renewal and a cleansing of the heart. Please oh God, make a miracle and soften he heart of mine and of hers, I have to believe. In my hear, mind and prayers always for the WoMH. be with the family. How long til You come back oh God?! How long til the pain goes away?!

Chinese proverb

A gem cannot be polished without friction, nor a man perfected without trials.

Not a chinese proverb

James 1:
² Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.


 ¹² Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

Faith

Yup a weeks worth of posting cause it didn't post before. Well, it happens. Reading it is confusing. Hm, guess it is a reflection of the mind and its craziness.

What if ..... Ah nevermind Dan, wishful thinking.

And lost a phone for work, like a week. Dang it Dan, you dumb dog.

Man wish she was here, dangnabbit! Heart longs for her . Broken by seether w/ Amy Lee keeps coming to mind and songs by RED . Sorrow and torn to what to do .

Dan, you're done with vid games for a few, they distract and most are bad it seems. Violence, sex, language, its crazy. Too many addicted. No more for while .

And gore. Haha gore was red stuff and such. Now, there is nudity and sex and such explicitness it is crazy! Tech might be better, but those running it are not.

It's scary how far yet how bad things look. Used to remember not being able to play mortal kombat or street fighter on PS1 and super NES because of violence

P a s s n o c r i t i c i s m s - G e o r g e E l i o t

P A n i m a l s a r e s u c h a g r e e a b l e f r i e n d s - t h e y a s k n o q u e s t i o n s , t h e y p

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

- Doug Larson

It was a bad night to have confrontation. At least some of the guys were there to keep me sane. Drunks! Why do they have to be confrontational?Why this and now?

What is a goal and at what extent would we go to reach it ? How important is it and where does it lead ?

The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goal to reach.
- Benjamin Mays

Seems test is worst near the end.

Its hardest to be patient when one is so close to finishing something. "Almost time to go home, can't wait" " so close yet so far" sounds about right.

She still in my heart and mind and it doesn't stop.

What direction is right and how is it weeded out with all the paths ahead?

Where is the right path? Where is the way to go?

Why so many posts? Cause it aint been posting Dan. All week gone

Feeling is being used as THE ANSWER not truth. Hm, isn't that what has killed lots of people? I "felt" it to be right, so I did this and I believe what I feel.

I read and ask questions, yet the most usual answer is "whatever makes you/me feel good." "If it feels good is being translated to "feeling good is being right"

Freedom was not free. Nor is life meant to be self centered.

The world is a weak place. Instead of empowering people they weaken them by giving excuses and allowing any type of interpretation to not "step on toes".

Psalm 149:4

For the LORD takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with victory.

I can not do everything, but I can do something. I must not fail to do the something that I can do.

- Helen Keller

I miss and love WomH. Dang It, is there any hope? It tears at the seams.

Too bad that is what the world asks and puts friends to be.

Hm, maybe I need a new job. Been working more in auto mechanics than my own job. Yikes. Still got empty feeling inside.

Longing and sadness and stuff .

The sunset is an amazing thing; colors change, sun is gorgeous, too bad gotta work :p

How do you find your world? Sometimes you don't know how much something is worth till it is taken from you.